2003 Films Reviewed

Is this the seven-year itch? Were these the seven lean years, or the seven fat? Why is Lust one of the seven deadly sins? Who are the other six samurai, and when do we start to fight crime?

These questions - and more! - will not be answered in this year's exciting edition of "Theo's Century of Movies" (Est. 1996). Instead, here are the 2003 Films Ranked by Rating. (But what do the ratings mean? This is what they mean.) Seven is the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be seven...

(V) = film seen only on video

(TIFF) = film seen (or first seen) at the 2002 or 2003 Toronto Film Festival

(ThIFF) = film seen (or first seen) at the 2002 or 2003 Thessaloniki Film Festival

Title (Rating)

AILEEN: LIFE AND DEATH OF A SERIAL KILLER (TIFF) (64)
ALEX & EMMA (37)
ALL THE REAL GIRLS (V) (42)
AMERICAN SPLENDOR (49)
AMERICAN WEDDING (35)
ANA AND THE OTHERS (ThIFF) (70)
ANGER MANAGEMENT (19)
ANYTHING ELSE (V) (42)
AT FIVE IN THE AFTERNOON (ThIFF) (26)
L'AUBERGE ESPANOLE (V) (62)
THE BACKYARD (V) (66)
BAD BOYS II (57)
BAD SANTA (V) (76) (second viewing: 74)
THE BARBARIAN INVASIONS (V) (70)
BASIC (V) (49)
BETTER LUCK TOMORROW (V) (55)
BIG FISH (V) (56)
BIKER BOYZ (V) (56)
BLIND SHAFT (V) (67)
BLUE CAR (V) (49)
BRIGHT LEAVES (TIFF) (71)
BRINGING DOWN THE HOUSE (V) (32)
BROKEN WINGS (TIFF) (62)
THE BROWN BUNNY (TIFF) (66)
BRUCE ALMIGHTY (35)
BUFFALO SOLDIERS (V) (67)
BUS 174 (TIFF) (58)
CABIN FEVER (V) (29)
CALENDAR GIRLS (V) (38)
CAMP (V) (58)
CAPTURING THE FRIEDMANS (V) (85) (second viewing: 87)
CASA DE LOS BABYS (ThIFF) (54)
THE CAT IN THE HAT (V) (38)
CHARLIE'S ANGELS: FULL THROTTLE (71)
CHARLOTTE SOMETIMES (V) (54)
CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN (V) (20)
COLD MOUNTAIN (57)
THE COMPANY (TIFF) (53)
CONFIDENCE (V) (38)
THE COOLER (TIFF) (36)
THE CORE (68)
COWARDS BEND THE KNEE (V) (65)
CREMASTER 3 (TIFF) (50)
CRIMSON GOLD (TIFF) (75)
CYPHER (V) (70)
DADDY DAY CARE (V) (37)
DALLAS 362 (TIFF) (75) (second viewing: 72)
THE DANCER UPSTAIRS (V) (67)
DAREDEVIL (51)
DARK BLUE (V) (43)
DARK WATER (V) (53)
DISTANT (TIFF) (62)
DOGVILLE (TIFF) (76)
DOWN WITH LOVE (V) (60)
DRACULA: PAGES FROM A VIRGIN'S DIARY (V) (69)
DREAMCATCHER (53)
EASY RIDERS, RAGING BULLS (V) (50)
ELEPHANT (TIFF) (51)
ELF (43)
FACING WINDOW (TIFF) (55)
THE FAR SIDE OF THE MOON (V) (57)
FEAR AND TREMBLING (V) (70)
FINAL DESTINATION 2 (48)
FINDING NEMO (65)
THE FIVE OBSTRUCTIONS (TIFF) (67)
THE FLOWER OF EVIL (V) (64)
THE FOG OF WAR (TIFF) (78)
FRANCE BOUTIQUE (V) (45)
FREAKY FRIDAY (V) (60)
FREDDY VS. JASON (V) (47)
FREE RADICALS (TIFF) (52)
FRIDAY NIGHT (TIFF) (65)
GIGLI (V) (48)
GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING (V) (48)
GOOD BYE LENIN! (39)
GOOD MORNING, NIGHT (TIFF) (73)
THE GOOD THIEF (TIFF) (69)
GOTHIKA (45)
GOZU (TIFF) (65)
THE HAUNTED MANSION (35)
HAUTE TENSION (V) (63)
HERO (43)
L'HISTOIRE DE MARIE ET JULIEN (TIFF) (44)
HOLES (V) (61)
HOLLYWOOD HOMICIDE (V) (52)
HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES (V) (41)
HOUSE OF SAND AND FOG (V) (53)
HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS (27)
HULK (45)
THE HUMAN STAIN (66)
THE HUNTED (63)
IDENTITY (38)
I'M NOT SCARED (TIFF) (25)
IN AMERICA (V) (68)
IN MY SKIN (V) (60)
IN THE CUT (TIFF) (54)
IN THIS WORLD (V) (64)
INTOLERABLE CRUELTY (46)
THE ITALIAN JOB (54)
IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE (V) (37)
JEEPERS CREEPERS II (V) (50)
JOHNNY ENGLISH (31)
JU-ON: THE GRUDGE (V) (51)
JUST MARRIED (V) (33)
KAMCHATKA (TIFF) (45)
KANGAROO JACK (V) (48)
KEN PARK (TIFF) (59)
KILL BILL (70) [first half: 85 (third viewing: 77); second half: 68 (third viewing: 62)]
THE LAST SAMURAI (47)
LAUREL CANYON (V) (57)
LE DIVORCE (V) (52)
THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN (28)
LEGALLY BLONDE 2 (45)
LILYA 4-EVER (TIFF) (56)
THE LIZZIE McGUIRE MOVIE (V) (62)
LOONEY TUNES: BACK IN ACTION (60)
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING (61)
LOST IN LA MANCHA (V) (68)
LOST IN TRANSLATION (TIFF) (47)
LOVE ACTUALLY (14)
THE MAGIC GLOVES (ThIFF) (63)
MAN ON THE TRAIN (V) (47)
MANIC (V) (63)
MASKED AND ANONYMOUS (V) (34)
MASTER AND COMMANDER: THE FAR SIDE OF THE WORLD (75)
MATCHSTICK MEN (59)
THE MATRIX RELOADED (49)
THE MATRIX REVOLUTIONS (48)
MAY (V) (56)
MEMORIES OF MURDER (V) (76)
A MIGHTY WIND (V) (52)
MONDAYS IN THE SUN (V) (52)
MONSTER (V) (27)
MORTADELO & FILEMON: THE BIG ADVENTURE (42)
THE MOTHER (V) (43)
MUD (V) (ThIFF) (17)
MY ARCHITECT (V) (60)
MY LIFE WITHOUT ME (V) (65)
MY LITTLE EYE (V) (43)
MYSTIC RIVER (73)
NATIONAL SECURITY (V) (38)
NO REST FOR THE BRAVE (V) (74) (second viewing: 76)
NORTHFORK (V) (57)
NOT ON THE LIPS (V) (73)
NOWHERE IN AFRICA (V) (64)
OLD MEN IN NEW CARS (V) (67)
OLD SCHOOL (36)
ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO (V) (41)
ONG-BAK MUAY: THAI WARRIOR (TIFF) (59)
OPEN RANGE (V) (65)
OUT OF TIME (66)
OWNING MAHOWNY (V) (72)
PAYCHECK (53)
PEOPLE I KNOW (36)
PETER PAN (58)
LA PETITE LILI (V) (52)
PHONE BOOTH (TIFF) (72)
PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL (46)
PISTOL OPERA (V) (66)
POLITIKI KOUZINA / A TOUCH OF SPICE (28)
PURPLE BUTTERFLY (V) (63)
RADIO (V) (35)
RAISING VICTOR VARGAS (TIFF) (55)
RAJA (ThIFF) (74)
RECONSTRUCTION (V) (ThIFF) (54)
THE RECRUIT (37)
RED THURSDAY (ThIFF) (33)
RESPIRO (68)
THE RETURN (TIFF) (82) (second viewing: 79)
THE REVOLUTION WILL NOT BE TELEVISED (V) (37)
RICK (TIFF) (w/o)
RIPLEY'S GAME (24)
RUN RONNIE RUN (V) (47)
RUNAWAY JURY (51)
THE RUNDOWN (61)
THE SADDEST MUSIC IN THE WORLD (TIFF) (61)
SCARY MOVIE 3 (57)
THE SCHOOL OF ROCK (TIFF) (74)
SCHUSSANGST (38)
SEABISCUIT (34)
SEASIDE (V) (41)
THE SECRET LIVES OF DENTISTS (V) (72) (second viewing: 70)
SECRET THINGS (V) (66)
SEXUAL DEPENDENCY (TIFF) (56)
SHANGHAI KNIGHTS (V) (39)
THE SHAPE OF THINGS (V) (39)
SHARA (TIFF) (72)
SHATTERED GLASS (V) (67)
SHE'S ONE OF US (ThIFF) (49)
SINCE OTAR LEFT (ThIFF) (46)
THE SLAUGHTER RULE (V) (57)
SO CLOSE (V) (58)
SOLDIER'S GIRL (V) (65)
SOMETHING'S GOTTA GIVE (V) (46)
SON FRERE (V) (49)
SPELLBOUND (70)
SPRING, SUMMER, AUTUMN, WINTER ... AND SPRING (TIFF) (73)
SPUN (V) (43)
STANDER (V) (47)
THE STATION AGENT (V) (53)
STRAYED (V) (56)
STRONG SHOULDERS (V) (55)
STUCK ON YOU (54)
SWIMMING POOL (60)
SYLVIA (55)
A TALKING PICTURE (TIFF) (69)
TEARS OF THE SUN (40)
TERE NAAM (62)
TERMINATOR 3: RISE OF THE MACHINES (64)
THE TESSERACT (TIFF) (27)
THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (44)
THE THIRD PAGE (TIFF) (w/o)
THIRTEEN (13)
A THOUSAND MONTHS (V) (63)
THE THREE MARIAS (V) (61)
TIME OF THE WOLF (TIFF) (69)
TIMELINE (9)
THE TRIALS OF HENRY KISSINGER (53)
THE TRIPLETS OF BELLEVILLE (TIFF) (67)
28 DAYS LATER (63)
TWENTYNINE PALMS (TIFF) (32)
21 GRAMS (TIFF) (61) (second viewing: 55)
2 FAST 2 FURIOUS (59)
UNDEAD (TIFF) (42)
UNDER THE STARS (55)
UNDERWORLD (41)
VALENTIN (V) (38)
VERONICA GUERIN (V) (41)
VIBRATOR (V) (56)
VODKA LEMON (TIFF) (37)
WEST OF THE TRACKS, PART I: RUST (TIFF) (65)
WHALE RIDER (V) (34)
WHAT A GIRL WANTS (30)
WILBUR WANTS TO KILL HIMSELF (TIFF) (44)
WILLARD (V) (32)
WINGED MIGRATION (V) (50)
WRONG TURN (V) (57)
X2: X-MEN UNITED (50)
YOUNG ADAM (TIFF) (48)
ZATOICHI (V) (62)
ZERO DAY (V) (68)